You might hear it over Facebook, down the pub or in the gym, but someone, somewhere has just got back from doing their season and well "it was just the best thing I've ever done in my life" followed by a '160 days till next season' post for the next 5 months. Although I'm taking the piss here, it's true, seasons are filled with friends that become your family and unforgettable memories. After spending 4 years doing almost back to back seasons, I can't begin to tell you about some of the situations and naughty stories I have, but I can say that there's not much I haven't seen when it comes to Brits abroad.

Where to do a summer season?

If your debating where to do your season: Malia, Zante, Magaluff, Aiya Napa, Ibiza? There really isn't that much between them. Anyone who has already done seasons will know, it's the family you build that makes them so unforgettable. I’m actually finding it difficult to concentrate writing this, as I'm using my Maga playlist to help the writing juices flow, but my brain has that many different memories going through it 

Non shags of Tokio Joes 2011 dancing to 'Teach me how to Dougie' and 'Rum and Red Bull'

Grace getting way too excited every time 'Pursuit of happiness' came on in BCM Square

'Uncle Cracker - follow me' 2012 end of season goodbyes with Abby, Charlotte, Claire and Kirsty

Dan Browns Unforgettable Casa Blanca and Heaven sessions 'Iris- goo goo dolls' 

Claire's birthday boat party 2013 'Something special- Miguel Campbell' and 'sun in my eyes-myomi' 

Every worker shuffling their tits off to 'reverse skydiving - shadow child remix' at every worker’s party

Getting ready with Sian and Claire and religiously playing 'The giver- Duke Dumont' and 'Real- Gorgon City'

Illegal sunrise workers Boat Party 2013 'one-day baby we'll be old- wankelmut remix' 

Best time to go

When you've decided where you want to pack up and head off, the best time to go is around the end of April / beginning of May. Some people get there in early April but hardly anything is open then, and most will be returners so will snap their old jobs back up. If not try the end week of June as everyone who hasn't got a job has pretty much gone back home. Book a cheap hotel for a week or so until you find a job and some accommodation. Returners who already have jobs can't stand it when all their accommodation is full of people who want to work but have no jobs! The fact is that you are nowhere near the only person out their looking for a job and accommodation, and you will find that when you do ask for jobs, there is already a million people who have asked before you. But fingers crossed you manage to get one, you never know, you may be lucky and land yourself a job straight away. 

PET HATE: please don't be that dickhead who walks round telling people he's a worker, when he's just finished his trial at bollocks bar and it's only 10.30. Or that other prick who pulls out the W hand gesture when walking down the strip and shouts worker to the other PRs, because the only thing you are mate is a WANKER. Now fuck off!  

Accomodation 

Accommodation can be a funny one. A lot of first years end up in what can only be described as a pit, but when you think about it those pits are mainly used to sleep of hangovers and slap up some super noodles. It can be quite difficult finding somewhere to live as like I said there are a million and one other people searching, but if you ask around and check in local papers or estate agents they should be able to find you somewhere, even if only for a few weeks till you find a better place. I've tried many times booking somewhere online, although I found a lot of people don't want season workers trashing their apartment (even if you say you won't, there's no telling what your summer holds), but the one experience I did have, I walked in to my new apartment for the summer and not only was it completely different to the pictures but it also had 3 girls living in there so after that I stayed clear. 

What to expect

Haha where do I begin with this one?  I guess the best way is to tell it straight. Sun, Alcohol, Sex, Nakedness, Dancing, more alcohol and more sex. It becomes the most enjoyable viscous circle going. Your daily routine will consist of waking up at 3pm with the alcohol shakes, but no longer a hangover because you are now pretty much immune from them and trying to piece together last night with your house mates, who are just as useless as you are. Next is a trip down to the closest food place for your 1 of 2 daily meals (any time a foot is stepped outside in daylight counts as sunbathing). This could take you between 5 and 30 minutes depending on how many other workers you bump in to and the amount of stories that unfold. After food you probably head back to the apartment, to the beach or sometime even back to the bar and before you know it, it's 7.30 and time to start getting ready for work. Work starts at 9 so you grab a jacket potato or pasta salad on the way and the night begins. When your allowed to drink at work, it makes it really difficult to not drink...EVER! So as the drinks begin to flow and shots are taken with customers, colleges and your boss, your night at work essentially becomes your local. When the clock hits closing time (normally 3/4 AM) one last drink at work is in order with the rest of your team and then it's off to the worker’s party! These parties are what make your summer and happen every night after everyone has finished. This is also definitely the reason I came back from my first season whiter than I left. I mean it is possible to get down on the beach, because I did a lot more of this from seasons 2-4 but my first season it just seemed like the most difficult this to do, and any day time activity consisted of drinking in mambos. But that's what it all about right?